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Is Your Cat Holding a Grudge?

is your cat holding a grudge

Have you ever found yourself thinking your cat was behaving out of spite or because she was mad at you? If you have, you’re not alone. This is something I hear on a daily basis when people call our office about a behavior problem.

Your Cat Isn’t Being Spiteful

The truth is, your cat isn’t planning ways to make you mad or exhibiting a behavior just to spite you. She doesn’t eliminate outside of the litter box, climb the curtains, scratch the furniture or knock things off the table as part of a plot to irritate her human family members. If you think misbehaviors are the result of spite, I can make a prediction as to what will happen:

1. Due to your inaccurate assumption regarding her behavior you’ll misinterpret her true motivation.

2. The bond you have with your cat will suffer.

3. Any correction you attempt to solve the problem will be ineffective and probably even counter-productive.


Your Cat’s Point of View

The key to figuring out what’s happening is to look at the situation from your cat’s point of view. The reason I wrote the book Think Like a Cat was because too many people miss the true motivation behind a cat’s behavior. If you don’t understand why a cat displays a behavior you won’t be able to implement the correct behavior modification. To be a problem solver you have to look at what the cat’s behavior is accomplishing. Behaviors aren’t repeated unless they perform a function. It doesn’t mean the cat parent likes the end result of the behavior, but from the cat’s point of view, the behavior makes sense and provides a pay-off. A cat who scratches the furniture isn’t doing it to punish you for coming home late from work, or to deliberately destroy your brand new sofa.



Scratching is a normal, natural behavior for a cat. If she’s scratching on a particular piece of furniture it’s because that piece meets her needs more effectively than the post you bought her (if you even have a scratching post). If there’s an unused scratching post nearby then that means it isn’t one the cat feels can do the job. It doesn’t mean she’s ignoring it because she’s spiteful. The post might just be too short, too wobbly, or covered in an ineffective material such as soft carpeting.

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